The 70th

We have an appalling tendency to lose ourselves with work. Not that it is something new for me, but I have had such an experience these past months. I never expected that my load would more than double when I stepped down from the corporate world, mistakingly thinking that family life and ministry will be easier. Nothing could be farther from the truth.

There were recent negative circumstances that somehow worked out for good, as it  "forced" me into reopening our family devotion. Father has been continually stretching out new horizons for me. First, no family should be without a devotional life. Back in the days when families took Christianity seriously, devotions came right after dinner. The dishes were set aside for washing, and the father of the house took his rightful place as priest and pastor, teaching scripture to the entire household. And after this and the dishes, the mother would in turn tuck the children in their beds, and spend another hour teaching them further about God. Our culture has lost the taste for such devotions. Relying solely on Sunday gatherings and fellowship, the role that parents' were to take up was slowly transferred to other people. The bible slowly lost its precedence in the home, and was set aside as just another accessory only to be brought out during Sundays.

Last February 28th marked the opening of our family bible studies, and Father shortly brought in seeking souls one by one, until it became a nightly evening class on its first week. Since then, it has been an exhausting but enjoyable attempt to balance the schedule between work (which took up half the day and well into the early hours of the next day), ministry, editing our recordings, and teaching at night. I was pushing my body to the limit by sleeping less and less, unmindful, and to a degree, careless.

I was working this Monday and felt a sudden stabbing pain on the back of my head. Early last year I nearly cut my leg off with a grinder, all the while composing myself and administering self remedy while trying to calm everyone around me by joking about it, this one stopped me on the spot. My wife applied ice to it till the pain subsided, but the headache started creeping in. By the LORD's grace I was still able to hold that night's teaching class, but I wrestled with a massive headache as I retired early to bed, my wife massaging my head till I fell asleep. 

 I realized I needed to consider resting again in the LORD.

Mar 6:31  And he said to them, “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.” For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat.

It was providence that I announced that night in our bible class that I would be asking for some time away from teaching to be with the LORD. But without thinking I told them we will still be holding two more classes till Wednesday. Monday night was our 68th session, making Wednesday our 70th. I don't see anything special with it, but I simply smile inside at how the LORD would have me rest after the 70th night.

My spiritual battery was obviously at 1%. Daily devotion and prayer, teaching and bible studies were becoming the norm. I seriously needed to get back to the cave and lay before the LORD. I confessed that I would rather discontinue the class and take time to once again seek the LORD, than continue teaching in the arm of the flesh. That is surely an effort in futility. The class has nearly tripled in number since we began, and the more souls are added, the more I am in a terrible position of responsibility. I must take heed to proceed wisely and with caution. Souls are the most precious things we can ever handle as human beings. I place myself solely in the hands of the LORD.

1Co 4:20  For the kingdom of God does not consist in talk but in power. 

Father has shown me no small kindness with the warm well-wishes of my sons and daughters in the faith. Their testimonies of growth in scriptural direction, their beholding of the wonder and majesty of God's sovereignty, their newfound realizations of the absolute beauty of Christ with new eyes, and their humbling fatherly gratitude towards me, make it all worthwhile. We beheld immeasurable wonders of His truth and His laws in our study just as he has promised. I have been so honored with great privilege to serve these souls. May I lose none of those whom He has entrusted to me. 

LORD, let thy servant behold face. Thy face, O God, is worth more than my life.

Credits to the owner of this photo.