After Two Months

For the last two months I have been both staying in and up working on our December projects, barely clocking in 25 hours of sleep a week. I wasn't able to work in the streets as I would like to during this time, occasionally managing to sneak some time out in the morning to distribute tracts at my nearby haunts. But what I lost in external ministry I gained in much needed time for the inner man, as prayer became my main occupation on a lot of silent and lonely mornings. There is something in these 4 AM meetings that refreshes me as time and time again I am brought into severe and constant self examination. "Search me O, Lord.." was my constant cry. Worship became my yearning. I am oftentimes reduced to being silent before the Lord, unable to speak. In my utter helplessness to impress the Lord with words, He was so much magnified before me. 

On our last week before submission I was finally able to go out again to minister to a place that has been on my mind of late. I was honored to be invited to fellowship with brother Roland the night before, and I agreed without hesitation. I badly needed the fresh air.

We met at 8 A.M. in Cubao, Quezon City. I was reeling on the train and was really dizzy from lack of sleep on the way to our location that I kept pleading with the Lord to grant me strength as I chose to spend the remaining hours from 4 A.M. to 6 in prayer for the ministry this morning. I stayed up fearing I might sleep through the whole morning instead. But as the day wore on I was delivered from my bodily weakness and was assisted mightily with my voice while brother Roland used the speaker.

A long queue of commuters were slowly making their way to the front of the line to catch their ride and we were given ample time to share the Gospel in the open air. Two men who were passing by kept us company for quite some time and bought food for us as well. I did not get to speak with them as I was busy walking around handing out tracts within the area but they wore white professional uniforms. I was told later, that they were both brethren, and that they stood by to listen and support us. One of them was a former street dweller, or as how we call them here, taong grasa. (a person who lives on the street covered in soot and grime.) The Lord mercifully saved him and radically turned his life around. God is great indeed.

Among our audience is a person I will affectionately call "tatay" (father or dad), he has an interesting story of how he was abandoned by his children and has been wanting to look for them since. He was talking with himself when we first saw him, but he approached us in the middle of our work and engaged us in a conversation about God. Brother Roland can tell he was under spiritual bondage. I asked if I can pray for him, to which he gladly obliged. He asked for healing for his leg, I prayed for healing for his heart. I know there would be some who would jump on the opportunity to ask for a display of healing power from the Lord, but the internal needs of a man without Christ far outweigh the external needs. The Lord indeed healed thousands upon thousands of people, yet none of them was there when he was being arrested. I believe that the greatest miracle that God can do is to regenerate a morally corrupt and lifeless heart. In these last days, Satan has been given power to do signs and wonders, so it wouldn't come as s surprise to me if in one healing crusade, missing arms and legs would grow, just to deceive the people. If anyone would still contest this, then I suggest you go clear out the nearest hospital of all its patients, including corpses lying in the morgue. 

Yes, the Lord physically heals. My wife and I  have been, countless times as recorded in my journal, recipients of this. I believe it with all my heart. But there is a tendency for a lot of people to dangerously lean far too much towards physical and emotional healing and use it as a gauge of spiritual prowess. If this healing does not produce repentance and total surrender of the life of the man to the Lord, then I have no interest in it. The Lord did not come to heal per se, but to give life. The matter of the heart. is the heart of the matter.

Tatay had among his belongings a small altar with catholic icons and booklets. We tried explaining as clearly as possible what the Lord required of us concerning the first and second commandment. When tatay particularly asked if we had spare shorts, I pulled mine from my bag, but asked to exchange it for his religious paraphernalia. He immediately clipped them off and gave them to me. (When I got home I burned them in the trash heap.) 

I only had two bibles in my bag so we offered it to the people for free as well. The moment I held my hand out one passerby quickly got one. Tatay also came near and asked for the other one. (Note to self: Always bring more bibles.) Brother Roland and I spent the next two hours in fellowship at the nearby food joint, talking much about the subject of prayer, and the burden of the Lord. I am truly humbled by the spirit of this man, and I am privileged to stand beside him during those precious times that we are able to labor for souls together.

May the Lamb that was slain receive the reward for his suffering.