Stepping Back

Currently seeking Christ, more than public preaching, posting, and social networking. 

Before I elected to wholly close down my connection to that platform, Facebook, near a year ago, many souls did earnestly admonished me to leave my postings public, relating how they served to edify the saints. Perhaps this held a measure of truth. Yet, I perceived a profound danger: that the act itself did serve to unduly elevate my own person, whilst also drawing my spirit into the shameful waste of precious hours, spent merely observing the idle activities of others.

A decidedly sour taste began to develop in my mouth for the sheer, daily clamour of the place—the overwhelming barrage of repetitive notions, the ceaseless memes, and the quotations from every popular theological celebrity of the hour. One was utterly swamped by the fleeting thoughts of men upon the affairs of this world, upon the character of their neighbours, and, most regrettably, upon the very nature of the Divine.

I found myself, by the grace of God, visiting the site with ever-lessening frequency, and my former interest in being deemed socially present or relevant dwindled to almost nothing. It is a blessing to be relieved from such a vexing sphere of vanity and noise.

So this is the point where I question my own faith, on where and for whom it stands; my very motives for all I do. I am willing and prepared to withdraw from everything I am publicly involved with, (except be the head and priest of my family of course,) detach myself from what has become in my eyes, a circus of dead bones and lifeless programs, elevated theological thought, and an unhealthy and idolatrous emphasis on academics and doctrine. Oh yes, one can ignorantly make everything else about Christ an idol. 

After much searching, I have presently left posting on my YouTube channel. And if all my subscribers unfollow then God be praised. I utterly detest and abhor promoting myself.

To care less about what Christians think and more on God's commendation. To care less about accomplishments and sacrifice and meditate more on compassion and mercy. To care less about my relevance and more on seeking that place of desperation for Christ's face. To care less about accumulating second hand knowledge and more on understanding the cross for myself. To care less about being active and more on being still before God. To care less about making myself heard and more on listening. To care less about doing more, and simply to wait on God. 

To find again and stay with my first love.