Stepping Back

Currently seeking Christ, more than public preaching, posting, and social networking. 

Before I closed down my Facebook almost a year ago people asked me to keep the posts public because it edifies the saints. Maybe. But it also elevates me, and pulls me into wasting precious time checking people's activities. I began developing a sour taste for its daily noise and overwhelming barrage of repetitive memes, posts, and quotes from famous theological celebrities; people's thoughts on things, on other people, and on God. I found myself checking the site less, and my interest to be socially present and relevant lesser still.

So this is the point where I question my own faith, on where and for whom it stands; my very motives for all I do. I am willing and prepared to withdraw from everything I am publicly involved with, (except be the head and priest of my family of course,) detach myself from what has become in my eyes, a circus of dead bones and lifeless programs, elevated theological thought, and an unhealthy and idolatrous emphasis on academics and doctrine. Oh yes, one can ignorantly make everything else about Christ an idol. 

After much searching, I have presently left posting on my youtube channel. And if all my subscribers unfollow then God be praised. I utterly detest and abhor promoting myself.

To care less about what Christians think and more on God's commendation. To care less about accomplishments and sacrifice and meditate more on compassion and mercy. To care less about my relevance and more on seeking that place of desperation for Christ's face. To care less about accumulating second hand knowledge and more on understanding the cross for myself. To care less about being active and more on being still before God. To care less about making myself heard and more on listening. To care less about doing more, and simply to wait on God. 

To find again and stay with my first love.