God's Gift After Experiencing A Man's Cruelty

It is with a measure of profound grief that I recall the cruel tactics used against me only the past year. I was addressed, albeit indirectly, by a pastor who sought to assert his spiritual superiority with the chilling words: "I am an ordained Elder. You are not."

Following this arrogant declaration, his poor, confused congregation was unnecessarily threatened with excerpts, carefully chosen and wielded, from the esteemed Calvin's Institutes—all in order to compel them to refrain from all correspondence with me from that day forward! Their dire warning was that should I "take" even one from the flock, I would be branded as nothing less than a ravenous wolf .

This is the very essence of darkened spiritual pride—a tragic temper that would rather stand idle and watch the poor sheep utterly drown, than humble itself to praise the Lord for leading those same precious souls into greener, life-giving pastures! But blessed be the Name of the LORD! My Heavenly Father hath led me through the narrow, arduous path right from the very commencement of my pilgrimage, and I rest in the unwavering certainty that He is not now about to let go of me!

My conviction remains firm, contrary to the worldly belief that mere numbers and outward success do dictate the true health of the Church: I possess absolutely no desire to add another single soul to my accountability on that great and terrible day of Judgment! My heart is seized by a simultaneous terror and a profound joy for the small, precious flock entrusted to my care. Small in number they may be, yet they are growing in awe of God’s majesty and His gracious, eternal election. I would rather, by far, stand as the poor, afflicted Smyrna, than possess the boastful pride of Ephesus.

It was by God's good and restraining grace that I was enabled to respond with quiet humility to that pastor's attack, rather than attempting to justify myself by human argument. There was simply no need! The Lord's own decree stands: Wisdom is justified of her own children. That man erred terribly, for he sought to condemn me and append a curse where the Gospel applies the eternal blessing of Romans 8:1: "There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus."

Moreover, since our diligent and in-depth study concerning the eternal Counsel of Peace (the covenantal structure of redemption), we have been graciously moved toward the Presbyterian form of church government. My heart was always convicted to abide under true church authority, even from our first gathering in the year of our Lord, Two Thousand and Seventeen. In that early, sincere longing, I confess I ignorantly deemed all reformed churches to be alike. Yet, through experience, I discerned the great and profound risk inherent in those forms of church rule which rely upon a single, overseeing pastor—a man accountable to none within his own flock, but only to superiors far removed.

In such a structure, there exists a fatal tendency for the pastor's own personality to be applied as the absolute law in the handling of all congregational affairs. The solemn consequence is that to question the pastor is deemed to challenge the Church, and therefore, to rebel against Christ Himself! I could not, in clear conscience, walk any further in this grievous error, for the fear of God is greater than the fear of man. And thus, for the sake of true order, I was despised and cast out, despite the very lowliness and grace I sought to exhibit on those painful occasions.

Abraham Booth writes, 

"I will now, my brothers, for a few minutes direct your attention to another divine precept, and then conclude. Paul, when addressing Titus in the language of apostolic authority, says, "Let no one despise thee." This is a singular and remarkable saying! No one, whether a professed Christian, an unbelieving Jew, or an idolatrous Gentile, should despise him. Observe, however, that it is not said, "Let no one envy, or hate, or persecute thee," but, "Let no one despise thee." How, then, was Titus to preserve his character from contempt? By the penal exercise of miraculous powers on those who dared to treat him with indignity? No such expedient is here intimated. By assuming lordly titles, appearing in splendid robes, taking to himself the trappings of state, and causing the vulgar to keep their distance? Nothing less. For that would have been directly contrary to an established law of Christ, and in consistent with the nature of His kingdom. 

But, as the apostle in another place plainly intimates, it was by becoming a bright example to the believers in word, in conversation, in charity or love, in spirit, in faith or fidelity, in purity. In other words, by being preeminent among those who adorned the doctrine of God our Savior."

The Christian Pastor's Manual: Pastoral Cautions. Page 101.

To grow in love for God and in zeal for His honor in conformity to the will of Christ, and in heavenly-mindedness, should be your first concern. Look well, therefore, to your internal character. For it is awful to think of appearing as a minister without really being a Christian, or of anyone officially watching over the souls of others who is habitually unmindful of his own immortal interest.
Abraham Booth

Since that time of trial, our heavenly Father hath sweetly gifted us with this Puritan library. This provision is granted so that we may walk forward in the same enduring learning as those saints whom God so powerfully used to shape the very history of His Church. I confess I do not lean upon the fleeting counsel of contemporary preachers nor the flickering images of the modern YouTube. My firm foundation is laid only upon the Holy Scriptures, the weighty wisdom of the Puritans, and the constant enabling of the Holy Spirit.

More than this, a pure and sincere love for reading and profound learning hath also been bestowed upon this unworthy servant. My consistent, disciplined schedule of study enables me, by God's help, to conclude thirty pages each day, which shall allow me to master at least eleven volumes before the passing of this year. Thus do we seek to redeem the time and honor the gifts of a generous Providence!